The Curators
Creature Location: Rust-belt Appalachia
Basic Description: A tall shadowy figure with bright reflective red eyes, large road-spanning wings.
Likes: Moonless nights, spooky bridges, bicycle rights, sugary nectar especially Red Gatorade.
Dislikes: Bright lights, underage drinking and driving, green apple kool-aid.
Resource of Interest: Mothman’s Medallion
The Cryptid
By nature, Cryptids are a rare and elusive bunch. But today we will be discussing the one who inspires perhaps the greatest air of mystique of them all: The Mothman. Indeed, the Mothman’s reputation is built almost entirely upon the mystery he engenders. Unlike a great many other Cryptids, the Mothman is not a species of creature but rather a singular entity with a clear will and plan of its own. He has been labeled in turn a demon, a prophet, a harbinger of doom, and an omen by people guessing at his goals and intentions. We at Surly Witches personally feel that these popular perceptions ascribe misplaced evil upon the poor Mothman.
Though he is a powerful emissary of dark forces whose glowing red eyes reflect the folly of man’s hubris, the Mothman’s true desire is to consume delicious sugary snacks. By appeasing this passion of his, you can win over the heart of the Mothman, after which he will confer to you his blessing in the form of an enchanted Medallion that the witch presents to the creature. Mothman’s Medallion should be a silver amulet with red gems. Ideally, two red, fiery gems as an homage to its creator. Once imbued with the blessing, the medallion conveys upon the wearer extraordinary powers of protection and is an object coveted by any witch worth their salt lamp. The protection bound to the medallion has a flipside, in that it will curse those who get on Mothman’s bedside. This fickle and mercurial nature of the Mothman is not to be tested, as is evident in this account from our east coast witch-in-training, Bubba.
THe Quest
-Excerpt from an interview with Bubba, friend of our fallen sister in witchcraft, Harmony
You see, I was never too magical myself. I could barely tell a newt from a toadstool. But Harmony, well she was something else. She could get five, even sometimes six inanimate objects roaming the house while at the same time reciting passages of unholy spells. And her potions, by the goddess herself, were out of this world.
One day, she tells me she needs a ride. Got a plan with some special incantation needing some “deep woods” components. And I trusted her, being the powerful spellcaster and all; expected her to know better. See, she didn’t own a vehicle, you’d see her around town walking, biking or on the occasional broomstick. I’d often drive her around out of town, and when she said we were heading to West Virginia to obtain Mothman’s treasure, I was happy to assist.
We began that drive out to Appalachia with a jar of honey, a six pack of root beer, strawberry marmalade, and what Harmony thought would be the secret ingredient, Green Apple Moonshine. After driving for hours, I pulled up to a rusty old bridge lost somewhere in the Monongahela National Forest. Harmony was glowing with excitement and I knew this is where she would summon the Mothman.
Everything seemed to be going to plan as night fell, Harmony slathered her body with jam and honey, dumped a can of soda on her head, and left the rest of the drinks open in a circle around her person. With the offering prepared she donned a silver necklace with a red medallion, in her excitement she sipped the moonshine to keep warm. While I was sat in the car trying to escape the cold grip of the night. Once the last of the lights were out and the moon was shrouded in clouds, he arrived.
In a noiseless flash, with wings spanning the lonely road Mothman came to examine the offering and began feasting. Seeming to enjoy himself, especially the flat root beer and the strawberry marmalade dressing. But when his proboscis tasted that moonshine, he immediately recoiled and let out a horrible shriek. The noise caused Harmony and myself to blackout. When we awoke, it was daylight and we saw that Mothman had smashed my car’s headlights, dented the roof, and spray painted a big black circle with two red dots on the trunk. I tell you, my mechanic looked at me kinda funny when I told him a deer did it.
But that’s not all he left behind. He must have thought that Harmony was alone, planning on drinking and driving though the mountains alone. For this he must have laid on her a curse rather than a blessing.
Less than a week later was when Harmony passed. She was riding her bike along her usual route to her Alchemists Anonymous meeting when suddenly a truck carrying a shipment of thumbtacks crashed next to her. The entire bike path was littered with the tacks, popping her tires and causing her to crash into a fire hydrant. The impact caused the hydrant to burst and the force of the water launched her into the air where she became hooked to a child’s kite. The kite was rendered free from the earth in a burst of gale force winds and carried her to the clouds which turned dark as it suddenly started to rain heavily. It was hoped that she would still be able to float down eventually but then a meteorite happened to strike the kite at that moment. Though it was very small and caused no damage, the metallic components contained within the space rock were enough to attract a bolt of lightning, whose electrocution sadly proved fatal. If only we had been able to obtain Mothman’s Blessing rather than his curse, Harmony would still be with us today.
R.I.P. Our fallen sister in witchcraft, Harmony.
The Blessing and the Curse:
As a spirit of demonic origin, this enchantment of protection on your necklace will allow you to travel by bike without being hit by oncoming traffic. Given the nature of his beastly vision, seeming to be able to predict doom and disaster, the Mothman’s Blessing protects those who seek safe travel by warring off bad omens. Mothman’s obsession with safe driving has been apparent since his very first siting. On that fateful night in 1967, before the collapse of the Silver Bridge, the Mothman was mistaken for some tail lights on the highway by some nefarious, drunk-driving teens. These events taught these kids the dangers of drunk driving and from that day forth his ominous and frightening visage has chilled the hearts of anyone who dares to drive dangerously. With Mothman’s Blessing, if you are bicycling around and suddenly charged by an oncoming vehicle, the driver will be magically warded off as the vision of the Mothman invades their mind. In short, Mothman’s Blessing has the power to protect the bike loving witch from all the douchebags of the road.
But be warned, as this power can turn against you should you fail the Mothman, and his powerful curse may instead take your life. We have already seen, through Harmony’s sad tale, that Mothman will respond negatively to alcohol at his ritual. Even if that alcohol is seeetened and flavored. But after successfully obtaining his blessing, one should still be cautious. Should you upset the Mothman by driving under the influence or putting a cyclist in an unsafe position, Mothman will deliver swift judgement upon you, corrupting the medallion and enacting his curse. So take care to follow the ritual accurately, and don’t drink and drive!
The Ritual
Jewels, trinkets and rare valuables will not do, as Mothman has no use for most earthly material items. Yet, he does need to consume nutrients, and though it may be a fearsome entity, Mothman consumes exclusively nectar, and other forms of liquid sugar. To summon him we must therefore offer a veritable banquet of fluid sugars. While one could try to appease the creature with pints of your sport’s drink of choice, we will find Mothman more hospitable and open to our offer if we provide it with a variety of offerings. As they say, variety is the spice of life! And for Mothman, this is no exception.
We would personally recommend gallons of various density fluids. These can include Raw honey, Canadian or Vermont maple syrup, simple syrup, gatorade, kool-aid, and 2L colas.
Caution: Mothman specifically responds well to red flavors, such as Raspberry or Cherry but poorly to green flavors such as Lime or Apple. Other colors seem to be generally well received but less enthusiastically than the red flavors. We believe this has something to do with the creature’s night vision, and possibly green interring with it, but as of yet we have not collected sufficient evidence to back this hypothesis.
The witch will place her offerings at the nexuses of a hexagonal spell circle and then will remove all of her clothing, save the pendant she has chosen, coat herself and the pendant with a thick lining of jam (again, as previously noted, Mothman responds best to red flavors). She will then wait in a clearing in the forest until the Mothman arrives. Open air will improve your chances of attracting the mothman. It will study her closely and judge the quality of the offerings for several minutes. If the Mothman is satisfied, it will begin to consume the items, extending its proboscis and sipping the offerings as through a straw. Expect to be standing still for several hours, as the mothman eats every ounce of food available, including the jam off of your body. Once the Mothman is done, you must look it in the eyes and very clearly and confidently speak the words of enchantment: “I now demand your powers in return for what I have provided.”
Caution: If Mothman feels you are not confident enough, it will flee the area quickly. When you return to your car, it will have “Loser” written on it. This was Mothman’s doing.
If Mothman is fully appeased, it will nod slowly, kiss the pendant around your neck and sink into the night. The next time that you have your bicycle, you will be acutely aware of how it is unable to be stolen. Any douchebag who thinks about taking it will have flashing visions of the creature occupy their thoughts and will be unable to steal it. Leave your bike unchained anywhere the next time you’re out!
Mothman Medallion
Equipment
- Wire clippers
- construction adhesive
- Sewing kit
- Sweet Tea
Materials
Requirements
- 2 peices reflective material Red and Round (eyes)
- 1 base clothing to carry the medallion sliver chain is a classic
Creative Alternatives
- 2 Reflective buttons
- 2 Bicycle/automotive reflectors red, circular
- 2 Safety supports black
- 1 black pipecleaners antennae!
Instructions
- First step is to collect your ingredients the classics like these pendants and necklaces can be found at your local crafts store. Silver Chain like this one is a classic, But I've found it can be uncomfortable.
- red and round eye components are critical! to allow the mothmagic to work it needs to already look like mothman's eyes!
- My initial test used these beautiful Rubies, but to poor effect. The construction adhesive on the back limited their effectiveness.
- The initial enchantment didn't work so well. Even gemstones weren't bright enough for the mothman's spell to work.
- Gemini had a lot of trouble until I found these at the dollar store. These are the most reflective things I could find (that still look like mothman's compound eyes).
- With a little work from my trusty sewing kit I was able to attach these to a much more comfortable base.
- Gemini will wear these young sporty vests which were a perfect fit for the mothman medallions.
- With a little bit of hard work from the sewing kit, the final product is ready for enchantment!
- With your medallions enchanted you are ready to hit the road! Day or night walk or bike the moth man protects you. Gemini has been saying people are steering very clear of her now that she wears her medallions proudly.
Notes
Hey witches,
Thanks so much for checking out our little blog. If you like it please comment and share!
-🧙🏻♀️+🧝♀️
